...or as I like to call it VD.
I just think it's ironic and humorous.
We are supposed to celebrate Valentine's Day tomorrow, but S completely surprised me today. I've known for a long time that he really doesn't give flowers, and he hasn't given any to me before, but he brought home 2 dozen stunning pink roses with 2 extra gorgeous red ones--to symbolize us--mixed in with them. I was speechless. And giddy. I love flowers and wanted them more than anything, but I didn't let myself think about them because I didn't think I would get any. He has no idea how happy he made me.
But, I am getting off track.
I've been pondering something as I am sorting through the 7 cards I bought for S for Valentine's: the wording the cards is interesting. I sift through them all in the store, spend a ton of money, and then get home and re-sift in an attempt to find the ones that say what I feel, because, of course, I can't say what I feel on my own. There is a distinct difference in the sentimental cards, though: the Me Card vs. the You Card.
The Me is the card centered on the person giving it, while the You is focused on the person receiving the card. It is pretty easy to distinguish between the two as the Me features lots of "I"s and "Me"s and the You sports, you guessed it, a bunch of "You"s. On some occasions card, shoppers can find a card--the prized card--that is the right blend of the Me and the You. It is a rare find indeed. And when you see it, you buy it, because it is "perfect." You may not know why; it just is. What you don't realize is that it is the Me/You blend.
Here's the problem with cards. It's the Me card. Too much of the Me can strike people funny. I mean, if you are giving a card to someone as a gift of sorts, you don't want the gift to be about you even if it says what you want or feel exactly. For example, as a birthday gift joke, I usually wrap up a couple used dog toys, from the dogs, for my parents on their birthday, just like a child might give a parent his or her favorite toy as a gift. It means, "I love you so much that I am willing to share my favorite thing with you." It is inherently sweet--from a child. Take it to the next level, though. "Honey, I just got you Madden 2009" or "Look, Sweetie, here's that new snow blower!" Yes, a wife or girlfriend may benefit from these things, but are they really focused on her? Let's see how this applies to cards:
Card #1
Loving you
means many things to me...
It means knowing
I have someone to rely on,
confide in, and trust...
it means knowing I have someone
who will share in my laughter,
my thoughts, and even
my disappointments...
But mostly it means,
that I always
have something
to be happy about...
because as long as we're together
the world
looks wonderful to me. --Robin St. John
Card #2
What is it about you?
Is it the warmth in your smile?
The way you can make
hours of conversation
seem like minutes?
Or is it the way
you look at me
that sees right through
to my heart?
Whatever it is,
It is something really wonderful--
because you are--
and it's something
that just feels
so right.
Happy Valentine's Day.
So, figure which is which? I think you did. So I am not giving you the answer. It can be tough, though, because sometimes there is a little of each with an overall skewing one way or the other. You just have to weigh them. As for me, I like both cards; obviously, or I would not have bought them as "potentials." If I got either, I would be happy. See, the Me doesn't bother me. In fact, I am a Me giver. However, I am acutely aware of the You card. It whispers to me, "Don't give him the Me; focus on the You." See, I think S probably likes the You better. It is focused on just him, and I think with his personality he would appreciate that style more.
So, I have searched for the rare diamond in the rough, the blended card, the one that says how he makes me feel and the one that says how wonderful he is. I have found two of them. Neither is perfect, and the first might be a bit too Me-like, but they are getting there. A little bit of Me and a little bit of You. I don't know which one to pick yet. I think the second one. While it is a bit focused and heavy on the Me at first, it has a nice blending and aftertaste of You--not unlike how we all start our relationships. It is a compromise. And a relationship does need to be about compromise.
Maybe I have made up my mind after all.
Card A
I always hoped
it was true--
that there is someone in the world
for each one of us to love.
After we met,
I just knew somehow
that you'd be the one for me.
I saw it in the way
you made me happy
whenever I was with you
and in the way you
could make me smile,
even when I didn't
really feel like smiling.
I saw it in the kindness
of your eyes,
the generosity of your spirit...
in the was we accept
each other's differences
and support
each other's dreams.
Over time,
I have come to see
that you complete me--
that our relationship
has helped me become
a better person.
I know that life
truly blessed me
when I found you,
and I promise
always to cherish
our once-in-a-lifetime love. --Emily Larkin
Card B
I'll always stand by you
as your lover, as your friend
and as your soul mate...
because there's nowhere else
I'd rather be.
Oh, I have lots of selfish reasons--
like how easy it is to be at your side
where life is never too scary,
where the future
is something we make together,
and where I simply adore
showing off to the world that you're mine.
But mostly, I'll stand by you
so you'll know that you're never alone,
that I believe in your dreams
and your choices,
and so that you'll know the strength
and comfort of my unconditional love.
I'll always stand by you
because I love you.
It's as simple as that. --S. Summers
